Essay Punishment Child

Topic (extracted from test 1, Cambridge IELTS 10)

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?


punishment can be made if necessary



It is believed that understanding the distinction between right and wrong is essential for children, in addition, punishing them is necessary if they make mistakes. Personally, I completely support this viewpoint.

First, the ability to determine an issue is right or wrong is crucial for kids because it is one of the elements that make their personality. Once the personality is generated, it will be stable and hard to adjust. Therefore, helping the to distinguish between good and bad behaviors is essential. Furthermore, punishment is helpful in case that children behave badly due to the guilty feeling it provides. Unless they are able to self-correct their way of thinking, stricter punishments should be applied.

In contrast, there are a lot of disagreements to this viewpoint. Most of the young adults think that children are still very young and punishments are unnecessary. To my mind, I believe that early age is the suitable period of time for a person to learn about morality, additionally, it is easier to train small children than teenagers and young adults. In the other hand, many people argue that a child will grow up eventually and he can learn themselves. As cited above, a person's character is stable once generated, and those children who are not trained about morality will be hard to fit in any community due to their lack of consciousness.

Many kinds of punishments can be used by parents and teachers to teach young children. Among them, the best way that I can think of is that we should make them stay in their own room, let them think about what they did and decide if it is good or bad. Any violent punishment such as hitting by a stick or not allowing them to eat should not be applied because the merely influence badly on them

In conclusion, I strongly agree with the viewpoint that the distinction between right and wrong should be taught to children and punishment can be made if necessary.

lack of uncommong vocabulary, such as "make"
and still there is typo, such as "helping the to distinguish between"
and will be different meaning between "young children" and "children

Mai, there are 4 elements that need to be represented in your opening statement. You neglected to mention that you will also be discussing what sort of punishment you believe should be given to children to help them learn right from wrong. A proper opening statement sample is as follows:

It is an accepted fact that children need to know when they are doing something right or something wrong. There is a strong belief that the lessons need to be reinforced with a punishment in order to help the children remember what they did wrong. In this essay, I will be discussing my opinion of the topic and what sort of punishment I believe is necessary to prevent the child from making the same mistake in the future.

It is important that you pay attention to fully developing your opening statement because this is the first scoring element of the essay. If you increase your score to the maximum in the task accuracy portion, you will be able to gain better consideration for any shortcomings that you may have in the other paragraphs. If you can prove that you understand the requirements of the essay, then the rest of the elements should be scored considerably better than if you had a low TA score.

Do not indicate your position on the issue within the opening paragraph. Stating your position requires you to present a discussion explaining that stand. Which is why it is always advised that you place that opinion in a separate paragraph within the essay. The opinion paragraph is your chance to prove that you have the GRA to express yourself in English and also, be understood by others. Stating your position in the opening statement defeats that purpose.

Always leave some time during the practice test to review and edit your essay. I saw a number of typographical errors and missing punctuation marks in your current work. That will cause a mark down on your part because you did not do well in the Grammar Accuracy range.

Your conclusion is good, but should have been divided into at least 3 sentences in order to meet the minimum sentence requirement which also helps to increase the task accuracy score.

... is essential for children. In addition, ...

... learn about morality. Additionally, ...

("In addition" and "Additionally" are used at the beginning of a sentence, and they should be separated from the previous sentence.)

On the other hand, (...) and he can learn by themselves.

Thank you all for helping me, I've just started to practice on IELTS task 2 and it seems to be difficult for me. By the way, if it could be marked, how much will I get? I expect to get at least 6.0 for writing so practice more maybe the right way for me



IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample 1072 - What sort of punishment should be allowed to use to teach children

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Last Updated: Tuesday, 04 July 2017 03:17
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IELTS Writing Task 2/ IELTS Essay:

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic.

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction.

To what extent do your agree or disagree with this opinion?

What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

You should write at least 250 words.


Model Answer 1:
How much freedom a child should be given and what sort of punishment could be used to control them is a matter of great concern. Undeniably, too much freedom and lack of necessary control often lead youngsters to go astray while too much punishment makes them dull and less creative. I personally believe that punishment is meant to help children learn lessons and that is why certain punishments that do not involve beating the children is useful.

To begin with, early childhood experience and lessons have lasting impacts on someone’s life and that is why parents and teachers should try their best to teach morality and good qualities to children. Children are curious and sometimes less mature to understand certain harmful effects of doing something while every father and mother want the offspring to become an ideal and exemplary person in life. They often need to use certain punishment to teach a valuable lesson to a youngster and the sole purpose of this punishment should be teaching a morality, should not be driven by any sort of personal anger or frustration. Physically beating a boy or a girl is in no way should be used as there are far better ways of punishing a child to teach him something.

While physical punishment is no longer used in most of the developed countries, it could still be found in underdeveloped countries. This form of punishment, in my opinion, should not be used. More effective penalties could be not talking to the child for a misconduct or not taking him to the playground for a day or two. Similarly, parents could refrain from awarding the child with chocolate or toys and reminding the child why he does not deserve those. If parents have a friendly relationship with the children and simply expressing their frustration for an act of the child, that would work like the magic. From my personal experience, I can say that I took matters more seriously when my father stopped talking to me for a certain period for something he disliked about me and I vowed many times to myself not to do that again.

To conclude, punishment is necessary to teach children morality and help them learn to distinguish good things from bad ones. However, this punishment should not be physical, rather psychological and practical.

 

Sample Essay 2:
Education is likely to be the most important thing to be learnt by every child and that education is not restricted in academic lessons only but also in behaviour field as well. Most people think that young children should be taught about attitude at an early age and a punishment is required in some cases to complete this education. I certainly believe that some punishment for the betterment of the children should be allowed which I will brief in the following paragraphs.

First and foremost, it seems that teaching good behaviour and virtues, when children are still in young ages, will be easier both by parents and teachers. Moreover, if this lesson is followed by an appropriate penalty, they will fear and think twice before breaking the applied rules. Research carried out by Statistics Center in Semarang shows that the plenty of youngsters are easier to have a good manner if they got this lesson before they reach their maturity. In addition, if the youngsters know that they will be rebuked and punished if they commit bad actions, they will usually stay away from committing mischievous acts. This research makes clear that a lesson followed by convenience punishments at an early age is likely to be a wise idea to create the youngest being a good member of the society.

However, the punishment should always bet to teach a lesson not to intimidate a child. The teachers and parents should always think about alternative ways before imposing any punishment to a child. If the child commits the same abominable act several times, then a minor punishment to teach a lesson should be given. A severe punishment by a teacher or parents could psychologically damage a child and the teachers and parents should always be careful about their way of punishment. Sometimes taking away a favourite toy from a child can be an effective punishment where no physical punishment is required.  The teacher and parents should keep in mind that the main purpose of the punishment if to teach the child a lesson not to hurt him physically.

After hashing out the issue, it can be concluded that a lesson to have good manner should be taught as early as possible and the effective punishment like rebuking or taking away favourite toys.

[ Written by - Gustriza Erda ]

 

Sample Essay 3:
Children are at such age of their life when they merely distinguish between the right and the wrong. It is very necessary for parents and teachers to teach them the same, first, by suggestion or advice followed by punishment as many times their inexperienced mind tempt them to do mistakes. Punishment should not affect a child negatively; rather it must be constructive for them.

Nowadays children are most vulnerable to get affected by surroundings and electronic media as they easily get exposed to such media. It is impossible to protect them getting exposed to the external environment. Hence it is mandatory for parents or teachers to make them aware of morality and injustice at this age and sometimes punishment is necessary to protect them. At an early age, a child possesses boundless curiosity as he is just exposed to an outside world or society. Thus they imitate what they see and that turns out to be disastrous at times. To avoid that minor punishment is the best way as fear of punishment makes them stay away from many wrong doings. To prove that, the Stanford University had done many surveys on children and the results show that 80% children who had already been punished for their particular mistakes had not repeated the same, on a flip side only 40% who are just advised.

On the other hand, punishments should always be associated with some lessons for children. Punishment must be fruitful and it must not be physically or mentally harmful. For example, world's nursery in Japan asks children to plant trees as a punishment. Many schools in India punish children by asking them to run few kilometres. Such punishments are constructive for children's health and society as well.

To conclude, I believe that children have to learn about positives and negatives at this age and punishment is one of the effective ways to guide them learn this distinction. However, parents and teachers must use constructive and positive punishments to show them the right path.

[ Written by - Mahesh ]

 

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